There's a song I always remember every time I hear the word Guardian Angel - Kermit's Rainbow Connection. Its sound's childish, I know, but a long time ago when I still believed in angels, I always thought angels lived in rainbows.

Why are there so many songs about rainbows? And what's on the other side.

It was then decided with that song in mind that my next pit stop towards finding meaning and touch was the toy giving mission among pediatric patients in Metro Manila.

Back then of course, I didn't understand Kermit when he said that rainbows are visions and only illusions. And I guess after biology, philosophy and my travels with nihilism and existentialism, I am proud to say that I still do not understand him.

Who says that every wish would be heard and answered when wished on a morning star?

So I concentrated on what can be understood and described in detail. Wishes. Dreams to a certain extent. And since we all wished for something when we were children, I concentrated on that longing for better toys and bigger G.I Joe's.

What I found was something that cannot be described - a child's smile.

I wished for so many things under the star every night. Better grades. Becoming taller and more good looking. Wishing that I will have my love returned. And although I never got them, I am grateful that for that brief Christmas moment, I made a child smile.

Someday I know, I'll find it - the rainbow connection. The lovers. The dreamers and me.