Descamesados is a fascinating word. It means poor. Lowest of all. Most vulnerable. Most unspeakable.

Beyond redemption.

In a medical mission last December 13 in pandacan, I saw her. She was one of them. Lowest of all. Most unspeakable. A child whose eyes could not hide the pain and the struggle - the most impoverished. And yet there is something haunting in those eyes. Something grand.

Mother claimed she had yellow colored sputum and fever. Temperature noted at 38 degree centigrade. There is a reddish discoloration on the anterior chest wall probably a birthmark. Symmetrical chest expansion, no retractions, lung fields are harsh.

I started her on amoxicillin 250mg/5ml, weight times MKD times 5 divided 250. Gave her a prescription of carbocisteine and paracetamol for the fever. It was afterall the only available drug in the medical mission.

A yes the birthmark. I knew it looked familiar. Reminded me of Lisa. She is just like Lisa you see. One of my addictions. And those eyes. How can I forget them? They have the very same eyes.

So unsure. So scared. So angry.

If only I could her that everything will turn out fine in the end. If only I could tell her that I am always going to be there for her.

Lisa does not understand too. She is just like my dark cherub. She does not see that every time I watch those eyes, I also see her.